Grumpy is going to try out a new format for Friday. (Shamelessly stolen from Letterman, by the way) Not that Grumpy will run out of actual in-game material thanks to the high percentage of asshats and morons in the general population.

Grumpy will answer questions he gets in PMs and maybe provide some witty commentary and biting sarcasm too. His readers are welcome to PM additional questions, and if Grumpy doesn’t answer personally, he’s either too lazy to do so or is going to use your PM in a Friday feature. Grumpy will keep your identity anonymous unless you specify that he can ID you. (not image design, noob. identify!)

Is it true that Grumpy is a professional athlete with a high-paying movie career? No, while Grumpy obviously COULD be, he’s too busy for professional sports and a movie career. (ok, Grumpy made up that question, here come some real ones.)

Is Grumpy a real player on Eclipse? Yes, Grumpy is an actual player on Eclipse, Master Architect, and his gf/business partner is an actual player on Eclipse, Master Weaponsmith, 11th or 10th best, Grumpy lost track, but her sales may some day soon kick Grumpy’s ass so he could be Eclipse’s first househusband.

Can I come shop at one of Grumpy’s stores? Who says you haven’t yet? Grumpy prefers not to advertise his wp’s here for a few reasons:

1. He wants his stores to stand (or fall) on their own merits

2. His gf is a more private person than Grumpy, and while Grumpy thinks it’s both typical and amusing that Grumpy prepared 16 hot dogs (and only hot dogs) for dinner, his gf might not think it was cute if players sent her tells asking if she had hot dogs for dinner that night again. (plus the obvious connotation which Grumpy KNOWS she would not find endearing), and

3. Imagine the fallout if one of Grumpy’s customers/employees recognized themselves, or thought they did. Grumpy might have a price put on his head. O wait, that did happen… for another reason… which you can read about on Monday.

What’s Grumpy’s game name? See above re: fallout and dire consequences. Although, as Grumpy has discovered, this has a downside…Grumpy remains an outsider to the board community and he cannot participate in auctions or quotes on Architectural Structures Worthy of the Gods (unless utterly irresistible), but he likes to delude himself that it gives him journalistic integrity… by that, Grumpy means deluded that he is a journalist and that he has integrity.

Yo, how much for a fusion generator? Yo, too much. And don’t think you can trick Grumpy into showing up for a surprise party in his honor by asking him to deliver 100k of grossly-overpriced resources to your store, either. Although if you wanted to treat Grumpy, you could deliver a crate of Tatooine Sunburn to every Architect’s vendor on Corellia, Naboo, Tatooine and Holocron planet. You’re bound to hit one of his stores at some point.

Are these stories true? Every single Tale is 100 percent true. Grumpy adds a bit of hyberbole here and there (maybe a dash of Artistic License), but he learned a long time ago (in a galaxy far, far away), there will never be a shortage of the vapid, the vacuous, the narcissistic or the rude — in this galaxy, or any other.

Werd up h0m3ys, yo

The Grumpy Master Architect ©